As I sit here and write this, I have a whole wide mix of emotions that I’m going through.
Frustration, disappointment, perplextion, and dismay.
When your teams season ends, especially in a game you feel like you should have won, it’s tough to find a way to deal or cope with it as a parent, player and coach.
As a coach, you’ve been working for 6 to 8 months, numerous days a week. Whether it’s creating practice plans, finding team video, doing off ice training, running on ice skills sessions, running those practices, and then running the bench during games.
As a player you’ve been attending those video sessions, doing the off ice workouts, attending the on ice skates and playing in the games.
As a parent, well, you’ve invested your time and money in getting your player to and from the rink for these sessions.
But then, when it abruptly ends for everyone, you’re kind of left with what I would describe as this emptiness..
I’ve found that self reflection is a huge key to growing as a player and coach. Sadly, I never did that as a player, but now I do so (and maybe take it too personally) as a coach.
I continue to ask myself:
What could I have done better from start to finish this season? Was I not strict enough on the players? What did I miss that held us back? What adjustments did I not make that would have benefited us? What did I spend too much time on and too little focus on?
This has been done every season of the decade plus that I’ve been coaching, though the steps towards positive growth have gotten better, there always still creeps in the negative and self-doubting.
That’s when mentors or knowledgeable friends come in, and you reflect with them and allow them to provide unfiltered and honest questions, thoughts and feedback.
I think we all need those people in our lives/community who we can reach out to for this type of discussion because if you don’t and you just continue on with what you’re doing, how will you ever evolve and get better?
It falls in line with one of my favorite personal growth quotes: “If you are the smartest person in the room, then you are in the wrong room.”
So yes, the ending of a season does suck, unless you are the one team who wins it all.
And that is okay to feel those emotions; to let them run their course.
It’s what you do with the experience and what you’ve learned that will help you become better at what you’re doing, so you are prepared for the next season that now truly matters.
-TDC
